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Okay, so... everything that has happened to me in the last month starting with...
YAMO: So, my scenes have been getting more and more forced as the deadline for the show nears, culminating in my absolute self-loathing and hate of it all. Fortunately, next week marks the deadline for stopping the new material and just starting the re-writes, which is going to be better. Unfortunately, since we writers spent so much time writing on our own, the sum total of 'my YAMO' is going to be a few odd scenes. Nothing which expresses my views on anything, nothing which will make anyone think. Just mindless funny. It has spurred me forward into a kind of self-justified angst, in which I want to do nothing but write my psuedo-surrealist comedy 'It's Your Line, Nicholas Perry,' written about a friend of mine who loves a girl but can never seem to speak up at the right time--this has been going on for two years--and my goading him to shape up and tell her. It's done in two acts, I think, with a beginning scene with both of us together talking, and then alternating perspective scenes between myself and him, then another scene at the end of the act with both of us talking. Besides those two scenes, we never talk to each other during the play. In any case, it's something where I can get my funny out there in a very morbid and cryptic way--which is coincidentally what I want to write, but it is very out of place within something which is supposed to be inherantly 'haha' funny like YAMO. I wish it wasn't supposed to be, but it kinda turned out that way. At least with Brian, Jane, and I writing, it's going to be darker than the normal YAMO. Which is why we want a light theme like 'the insanity of love' or marriage or something like that. There's something that bothers me about how they've written the thematic scenes so far. I'm going to brainstorm with Herbert on Monday. That's that.
Scots/Ireland: Yes; yes I have gone on an excellent vacation to Scotland and Ireland. I was visiting colleges, and spent four days in Dublin looking at Trinity, and about six days staying at St. Andrews, where I looked at St. Andrews and Edinburgh colleges. Trinity's degree program is much too strict, I don't think there's any way I'll even be applying there. St. Andrews is lovely, albeit a very very small town, and one where I'm probably going to be culture shocked to no end. Edinburgh is a bigger city with a bigger university, and they want 4s on all of one's APs. I got a 4 on my AP History one this year, which is not bad. I blame the lack of a 5 on my realization that I know absolutely nothing about the French-Indian War, and had to write a very large DBQ essay about it. Ha. In any case, it was lovely, and now I'm back.
-
So, that's a summary of events.
Right now I'm going through a phase similar to that of last summer. The one where I want to watch Trigun, eat pudding, and stay up until the early hours of the morning to watch M.A.S.H., and all with Ta-chan. And not with other people, either. Maybe the Vash Broom. I miss 法師さま Because of it. Bah. Except I'm not letting myself go back there and do that again, because no matter how much I miss something, I can also understand the difference between nostalgia and something that should actively be made part of my future. It makes me hiss, really. Besides that, I'm feeling a very overt need to be by myself in the sort of way that being with Ta-chan affords. Honestly, it is companionship while delving through one's thoughts. You aren't alone, but you're alone with your thoughts. She's just as shielded as I am, which makes it nicer being around her than being around someone who wants you to take an active interest in the fact that they're there. Sometimes it's almost oppressive, being around people who want to be completely open with you. I think, 'No, I have no interest in being completely open with anyone,' but it's like they're still asking. Pleading, even. 'Come on, open up, I trust you, you trust me, everything's fine, I'm just going to lean on your mind now. Pressure it, so you'll bend under it, and let me in.' 'Nope, hell no, I don't do that with anyone, and you're going to have to learn to deal!'
And if you don't want to learn now to deal, you besta just leave me alone.
I want to go for a night wander, but I find myself unable to stay up past eleven without collapsing and sleeping.
However, I also woke up at five in the morning naturally today, after a very strange dream. It was very detailed, but I can't remember what the details are anymore. I remember being a princess, and I remember living in a giant cage that was high above the ground. I also remember they were going to kill me because of something they thought I had done, but I didn't. Or because of something they thought they had to do, but didn't. My sister didn't know I was the princess, only my mom did. So before I was in the cage waiting to be shot with arrows, I lived as a normal person with my family. I had planned out how to escape from the cage while they were trying to kill me. There were only ten executioners originally, so I thought I'd ask them as a last favour if I could be killed while breathing the free air outside the cage--essentially coming out the top of it--and when they shot, I'd flip down and run away. However, my sister was listening to a radio show, and she thought the princess was very strong. So when the radio announcer asked if ten executioners would really be able to deal with the princess, she called in and said proudly 'Not even 100 executioners could kill the princess.' and so they instituted ninety more of them. I was freaking out when she said that, because she had just essentially killed me. So I was feeling really bad when they dressed me up like Garnet from FFIX--the white dress--and put me in the cage. I was to die for some reason or another. But I did go ahead and ask if I could breathe the fresh air, and since I was a pretty beloved princess, they said okay. So they shot, and I flipped, but a couple arrows hit me on the way down; one in my right arm near the shoulder, and one in my left side. I still managed to run through the crowd and into an alley, where I cut my hair off, left all my princess clothing, put on a tanktop and shorts, and bought some contacts to change my eye colour to grey. I don't know what happened with the arrows, but I walked off. Then there was some little bit of dream later where the problem had been found, and everyone was mourning that the princess was dead, so I came back and declared that I was the princess. I think I was just a figurehead anyway--something for the people to love. Anyway, then I woke up, and it was 5:15am.
I forgot a whole lot of that dream at the beginning. It had something to do with Chicago, or a city like it. Except one of the big buildings down by the harbour was the tall cage building.
Now I think I'll call Paul and Becca; we ought to finish Secret of Mana. :D
YAMO: So, my scenes have been getting more and more forced as the deadline for the show nears, culminating in my absolute self-loathing and hate of it all. Fortunately, next week marks the deadline for stopping the new material and just starting the re-writes, which is going to be better. Unfortunately, since we writers spent so much time writing on our own, the sum total of 'my YAMO' is going to be a few odd scenes. Nothing which expresses my views on anything, nothing which will make anyone think. Just mindless funny. It has spurred me forward into a kind of self-justified angst, in which I want to do nothing but write my psuedo-surrealist comedy 'It's Your Line, Nicholas Perry,' written about a friend of mine who loves a girl but can never seem to speak up at the right time--this has been going on for two years--and my goading him to shape up and tell her. It's done in two acts, I think, with a beginning scene with both of us together talking, and then alternating perspective scenes between myself and him, then another scene at the end of the act with both of us talking. Besides those two scenes, we never talk to each other during the play. In any case, it's something where I can get my funny out there in a very morbid and cryptic way--which is coincidentally what I want to write, but it is very out of place within something which is supposed to be inherantly 'haha' funny like YAMO. I wish it wasn't supposed to be, but it kinda turned out that way. At least with Brian, Jane, and I writing, it's going to be darker than the normal YAMO. Which is why we want a light theme like 'the insanity of love' or marriage or something like that. There's something that bothers me about how they've written the thematic scenes so far. I'm going to brainstorm with Herbert on Monday. That's that.
Scots/Ireland: Yes; yes I have gone on an excellent vacation to Scotland and Ireland. I was visiting colleges, and spent four days in Dublin looking at Trinity, and about six days staying at St. Andrews, where I looked at St. Andrews and Edinburgh colleges. Trinity's degree program is much too strict, I don't think there's any way I'll even be applying there. St. Andrews is lovely, albeit a very very small town, and one where I'm probably going to be culture shocked to no end. Edinburgh is a bigger city with a bigger university, and they want 4s on all of one's APs. I got a 4 on my AP History one this year, which is not bad. I blame the lack of a 5 on my realization that I know absolutely nothing about the French-Indian War, and had to write a very large DBQ essay about it. Ha. In any case, it was lovely, and now I'm back.
-
So, that's a summary of events.
Right now I'm going through a phase similar to that of last summer. The one where I want to watch Trigun, eat pudding, and stay up until the early hours of the morning to watch M.A.S.H., and all with Ta-chan. And not with other people, either. Maybe the Vash Broom. I miss 法師さま Because of it. Bah. Except I'm not letting myself go back there and do that again, because no matter how much I miss something, I can also understand the difference between nostalgia and something that should actively be made part of my future. It makes me hiss, really. Besides that, I'm feeling a very overt need to be by myself in the sort of way that being with Ta-chan affords. Honestly, it is companionship while delving through one's thoughts. You aren't alone, but you're alone with your thoughts. She's just as shielded as I am, which makes it nicer being around her than being around someone who wants you to take an active interest in the fact that they're there. Sometimes it's almost oppressive, being around people who want to be completely open with you. I think, 'No, I have no interest in being completely open with anyone,' but it's like they're still asking. Pleading, even. 'Come on, open up, I trust you, you trust me, everything's fine, I'm just going to lean on your mind now. Pressure it, so you'll bend under it, and let me in.' 'Nope, hell no, I don't do that with anyone, and you're going to have to learn to deal!'
And if you don't want to learn now to deal, you besta just leave me alone.
I want to go for a night wander, but I find myself unable to stay up past eleven without collapsing and sleeping.
However, I also woke up at five in the morning naturally today, after a very strange dream. It was very detailed, but I can't remember what the details are anymore. I remember being a princess, and I remember living in a giant cage that was high above the ground. I also remember they were going to kill me because of something they thought I had done, but I didn't. Or because of something they thought they had to do, but didn't. My sister didn't know I was the princess, only my mom did. So before I was in the cage waiting to be shot with arrows, I lived as a normal person with my family. I had planned out how to escape from the cage while they were trying to kill me. There were only ten executioners originally, so I thought I'd ask them as a last favour if I could be killed while breathing the free air outside the cage--essentially coming out the top of it--and when they shot, I'd flip down and run away. However, my sister was listening to a radio show, and she thought the princess was very strong. So when the radio announcer asked if ten executioners would really be able to deal with the princess, she called in and said proudly 'Not even 100 executioners could kill the princess.' and so they instituted ninety more of them. I was freaking out when she said that, because she had just essentially killed me. So I was feeling really bad when they dressed me up like Garnet from FFIX--the white dress--and put me in the cage. I was to die for some reason or another. But I did go ahead and ask if I could breathe the fresh air, and since I was a pretty beloved princess, they said okay. So they shot, and I flipped, but a couple arrows hit me on the way down; one in my right arm near the shoulder, and one in my left side. I still managed to run through the crowd and into an alley, where I cut my hair off, left all my princess clothing, put on a tanktop and shorts, and bought some contacts to change my eye colour to grey. I don't know what happened with the arrows, but I walked off. Then there was some little bit of dream later where the problem had been found, and everyone was mourning that the princess was dead, so I came back and declared that I was the princess. I think I was just a figurehead anyway--something for the people to love. Anyway, then I woke up, and it was 5:15am.
I forgot a whole lot of that dream at the beginning. It had something to do with Chicago, or a city like it. Except one of the big buildings down by the harbour was the tall cage building.
Now I think I'll call Paul and Becca; we ought to finish Secret of Mana. :D
