stuff

I'm reading this book--and it told me to write,
to be unashamed, cry, laugh,
and worry about cancer in the mornings
feel like nobody loves me
and rail at the sky in the middle of town
when everyone is watching
go to sleep
and do it all again.

My acting professor also tells me
to be unashamed, cry, laugh,
and muse about having cancer in the mornings
act like everyone loves me
and rail at the sky in the middle of town
when no-one is watching
skip sleep
and do it all again.

All of which compounds into a
shameless woman
who wonders about death
rarely looks how she feels
has conversations with God
all alone and with all
Sleeps always and never
and never stops.

But when have I ever done
What anyone told me to do?